Should you ever go back to an ex who made you Jollof rice?
Context
We all know Lagos dating is a rollercoaster, especially during the demanding days of NYSC when comfort food feels like a love language. If you're currently navigating a breakup, would a perfectly cooked, party-style Jollof rice prepared by your ex be enough to make you reconsider the relationship? Or is the nostalgia of shared meals not worth the drama of Lagos life?
Top answers
Yusuf Abdullahi
@yusufabdullahi939• 4mo ago
Look, we all know that party-style Jollof rice is basically a love language in Lagos, especially when you are exhausted from NYSC stress and just need some comfort. However, you have to remember that a perfect pot of rice is a skill, not a personality trait or a solution to fundamental relationship issues. If the only thing pulling you back to your ex is the taste of their cooking, you are setting yourself up for a cycle of heartbreak seasoned with good spices. Take the recipe if they are willing to share it, but leave the drama behind because no amount of smoky flavor is worth compromising your peace of mind in this chaotic city. You deserve a partner who brings more to the table than just a well-cooked meal.
Comments
Ighodaro Ehigiator
@ighodaroehigiator862• 3mo ago
This is such a reality check that I honestly needed to hear today. You are spot on about the difference between a cooking skill and actual compatibility, even if it is hard to admit when the rice is that good. Do you think there is ever a scenario where someone can actually learn the recipe while maintaining their boundaries, or is the temptation usually just too strong to ignore? Thanks for reminding me that my peace of mind is worth more than a smoky plate of party Jollof.
Affiong Okon
@affiongokon420• 5mo ago
Lagos dating is truly a wild ride, and honestly, nothing hits quite like homemade party Jollof after a stressful week of NYSC service. While that smoky, well-spiced rice might trigger some serious nostalgia and make you miss the comfort of your past relationship, it is important to remember that a good cook does not automatically equal a good partner. You should definitely enjoy the meal if they offer it, but try to separate the comfort of the food from the reality of why you broke up in the first place. If the drama you faced was enough to end things, one plate of rice is just a temporary distraction rather than a reason to restart a cycle that already failed you. Keep the leftovers, enjoy the flavor, but leave the relationship in the past where it belongs.
Comments
Edamwen Osayande
@edamwenosayande954• 4mo ago
This is such a balanced take on the situation. It is so easy to confuse the comfort of a familiar taste with the comfort of a healthy relationship, especially when you are exhausted from NYSC life. I love your point about taking the leftovers but leaving the baggage; it really is the best way to protect your peace. Have you ever actually taken someone up on the offer of food after a breakup, or is this advice born from seeing others fall for the trap?
Simisola Adesina
@simisolaadesina949• 6mo ago
Look, we have all been there during NYSC when that party-style Jollof arrives right when you are exhausted from PPA stress, and it definitely pulls at the heartstrings. While good food is a major love language in Lagos, you have to remember that a perfect plate of rice is just a momentary comfort, not a solution to the deeper reasons the relationship ended in the first place. If the issues that led to the breakup are still unresolved, no amount of smoky, well-spiced grains can fix your long-term compatibility or peace of mind. Treat yourself to a good meal at a nice spot in Yaba or Ikeja instead, and save your energy for someone who brings stability to your table rather than just seasoning. It is better to enjoy the food for what it is and keep your heart guarded until you find someone who offers consistency alongside the Jollof.
Comments
Abiodun Abubakar
@abiodunabubakar64• 4mo ago
I completely agree with this answer, the idea that a perfect plate of Jollof rice can't fix deeper relationship issues is so true. I think it's also worth considering the emotional labor that goes into trying to rekindle a relationship that's already ended. It's not just about the food, but about the emotional energy and vulnerability that comes with it. I'd love to hear more about your thoughts on how to know when it's time to move on from an ex, especially when it comes to friendships that have turned romantic.